- Oh, hi, Roz. - Oh, there you are.
I brought something for Daphne. I was gonna leave it with the doorman.
DAPHNE: Ohh... - Good Lord.
- Did I say something? - Well, actually,
Doorman Morrie passed away this week.
- We just got back from the funeral. - Oh, my gosh, I'm so sorry.
Is she going to be all right?
Well, you know, she's been a little high-strung, even before he died.
- I guess it's wedding stuff, you know. ROZ: Yeah.
DAPHNE: Oh, sorry about that.
So you brought me something, Roz?
Yeah, I figured you can't get married without wearing something borrowed.
Oh, what a beautiful garter. Look at all the lovely detail.
I especially like the little odometer.
Thank you so much, Roz.
Does anybody besides me feel like a cup of coffee?
- I'll brew a pot. - Oh, don't be silly.
I've been here enough to know how to get coffee made.
Daphne, make us some coffee.
Kidding.
The Wayside Inn.
Is this where you're having your wedding? Oh, gosh, it's just beautiful.
I hope it is. The planning has been a nightmare.
I spent an hour today on the seating chart.
Everyone has some demand:
"Don't seat me near the band. Mind if I bring a friend?"
You can't seat me next to him.
Exactly. Every selfish, whiney little...
No, you cannot seat me next to Tim Walsh.
I dated him all last summer and he dumped me.
He's going with my bridesmaid, Annie. I have to seat bridesmaids together.
This always happens to me.
Is there no place I can go without running into some guy I've dated?
I was reading a Trappist Monastery in the Amazon they built in the treetops.
Shut up, you big doily.
This is gonna be awful.
Here I am at a wedding sitting next to a guy who dumped me.
Oh, come on, Roz, you won't be alone.
You'll be on the arm of a well-known Seattle boulevardier and radio star.
Frasier, I can't go with you.
I mean, going to a wedding with your boss
is like going to the prom with your brother.
Niles and I did not go to the prom together.
Our dates were sick and we went stag.
Yes, we should have cancelled the horse-drawn carriage,
but hindsight is 20-20.
- Hey, hey, Roz. ROZ: Hi, Martin.
I'm sorry to hear about your friend Morrie.
Oh, thanks. Yeah, his wife just did the nicest thing.
I guess she knew Eddie and I would stop by and shoot the breeze with him.
So she gave me something to remember him by.
"For Martin and Eddie." Isn't that nice?
- Yeah, I think it's some kind of wine. - Well, yes, I'd say so.
My God, Dad, this is a 1945 Château Pétrus.
She said he got it from his uncle who was in France after the war.
One of the rarest bottles in the world.
Well, if you're good, maybe Eddie will give you a glass out of his half.
I've never even seen a '45 Pétrus.
Oh, poor Morrie.
He probably waited his whole life
for an occasion special enough to open that bottle.
Perhaps this should be a lesson for us all.
Morrie may be standing guard at the door to heaven right now,
but he's buzzing us with one last message:
"Live life now."
I'm reminded of a parable.
ALL: Come in.
- Simon? - Hello, sis.
I thought you were in California.
Yeah, well, those friends I went to surprise were out of town.
So I decided to housesit for them, which was lovely
until they came home last night.
I don't know what all the screaming was about.
I was the one in the tub.
Where should I put this bag?
By the door, so you don't forget it when you leave.
Right. Well, I think I know everybody here.
Or do I?
And what would your name be then, miss?
Simon, you low-life idiot.
You made a date with me last week and you stood me up.
Sorry, love, I need a bit more to go on.
Maybe this will refresh your memory.
Roz. Of course.
- Well, look who's back. - Why, who's this then?
I'd say it was Marty Crane but he's a bit too young and trim, huh?
Oh, come on. Can I offer you a beer?
I hate to drink alone. Can I have a sandwich with that?
MARTIN: Yes.
If that beer-swilling boomerang thinks he's staying here,
he's got another thing coming.
Better get a move on. He already has your address on his duffel bag.
We better get going if we're gonna reach the cabin by dark.
- Cabin? NILES: Yes.
Mel and I are celebrating our six-month anniversary
by taking a little mid-week getaway to her friend's country place.
Yes. No phones, no stress, just two days of rest and relaxation.
I do have to pick up a little anniversary gift, though,
so give me nine minutes and meet me at the northwest corner
of Pike and Elm at 4:42.
Coming up on 4:33.
- Synchronizing... - Now. Good,
I'm relaxing already. Mwah.
Thank you, Marty. That was most hospitable of you.
- You have to have a place to stay. - Stop right there.
He cannot stay here. The man is loud, ill-mannered,
and the last time he stayed here, he killed a ficus tree
on the downstairs neighbour's balcony by means which are best left
to the imagination.
Frasier, I invited Simon to stay in my Winnebago.
Come on, Simon, I'll show you your new digs.
- Oh, Lord, you know, I'm sorry... - Oh, forget about it.
It's no worse than what I was just saying about you in the kitchen.
Good one.
He thinks I'm joking.
- Join me in a sherry, Frasier? - Oh, I think I will, Niles.
You know, I have to admit
I'm a bit nervous about this trip.
I have a feeling Mel may make another push for us to live together.
FRASIER: Oh, my. - She's been bringing it up a lot lately.
She says it's a good way to test our relationship.
Afraid you'll discover things about each other that you won't like?
Oh, no. No, no, we're past that stage. She knows my likes and dislikes.
And I've become attuned to her various quirks.
Eccentricities.
Bugaboos.
Night terrors.
The fun of being in love.
I don't know what's bothering me.
Is it possible that your foot-dragging
might have anything to do with lingering feelings for Daphne?
Frasier, you must realise I put that behind me months ago.
- I'm just asking. - I'm happy with Mel.
Well, then, what's your problem?
Well, let's see.
I just got through a rough divorce.
I do have a tendency to be overly cautious.
This could be a chance to change all that.
So you're in favour of it?
Well, never really been the president of the Mel fan club,
but she does seem to make you happy.
And as we were reminded this morning,
life is not to be taken in baby steps.
Ask not for whom the doorman buzzes.
Thank you.
All right, that was much-needed therapy, Frasier.
Well, Niles, it's my pleasure.
You're my brother. You get the family rate.
Hey, Niles.
Got all the way to the Winnebago and realized I had the wrong keys.
- See you in a couple of days. - Bye-bye.
You don't say, Mama, your phlebitis again?
- Daphne. DAPHNE: Oh, got to go now, Mom.
Dr. Crane's on the Warpath again. Bye.
Thank you.
Daph, I'm glad you're here.
I was thinking about that wine of Morrie's.
That's something really for a special occasion.
So I'd like you to have it for the wedding. Enjoy it on your honeymoon.
- Oh, Mr. Crane. - Daphne, come on. Come on, now.
It's only a bottle of wine. I don't even know much about it.
Frasier, help me out here, will you?
Well, Dad, Château Pétrus is a premier cru Bordeaux.
No, no, no, I mean with Daphne. There you go.
FRASIER: Oh, there now.
I'm sorry to get so emotional like this.
It's all right.
- The funeral must have upset you. DAPHNE: It's not that.
Dr. Crane, I've wanted to talk to you about this all week,
but I haven't known what to say.
Can you promise you'll keep this just between us?
Of course.
It's about your brother.
You see, I know.
Know what?
I know about his feelings for me.
My God.
How did you find out?
It's not important.
Somebody blabbed, didn't they?
Why can't people mind their own business?
Who was the nattering gossip? Roz? Dad?
- You. - What?
You were taking those pills for your back,
and you blurted it out while I was giving you a massage.
Oh, well, they were very strong pills, you see, and...
Needless to say, it completely took my breath away.
At first, I tried to forget about it, put it out of my mind, you know.
- The bottle said one, but I'm a big... - Will you shut up about those pills?
I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Daphne.
Anyway, after a while, I couldn't put it out of my mind anymore.
I find myself thinking about him all the time.
Daphne.
Are you saying that you have feelings for Niles?
I think I do.
Oh, I don't know.
Even if I did, he may not feel that way about me anymore.
He's with Mel now.
Oh, I don't know what to tell you, Daph.
I... I think that the best thing is to try to find a way to talk with Niles.
Oh, that's not an easy conversation to have.
It's easier now than after you're married.
You're right.
I have to talk to him. And right away.
I'm already making myself sick over this.
If I leave it any longer, I'll be a complete basket case.
Did he mention if he was going home?
Well, actually, he's... He's going somewhere else first.
Where?
- I'll get you towels and you'll be all set. - Right.
Oh, jeez, Daphne, it's just a bottle of wine.
DAPHNE: I'll get it.
Oh. Dr. Crane. I didn't even know you'd gone out.
- I thought you might be your brother. - I went down to get the mail
and all these wedding gifts for you. But don't worry,
Niles called and said he'd be coming by this afternoon.
I don't even know how I'm gonna begin this conversation.
Those chocolate-chip-blackened teeth will be a nice ice breaker.
I've been so nervous lately, I've done nothing but stuff myself with junk food.
- It's him. - All right, all right, fine.
You're gonna be just fine. Okay? Remember to speak from the heart.
- Mr. Crane. - Thanks. Eddie started doing his
"I don't know how much longer I can hold this" dance,
and I just ran out without my keys.
- You ever seen him do that dance? - Just the droll impression you do.
You know, Mr. Crane, Eddie seems awfully fidgety.
I don't think he got enough exercise on that walk.
If anybody needs any exercise, it's you, the way you're eating now.
You know, when they put "party size" on that cookie bag,
they don't mean party of one.
Simon, what do you want?
Well, I'm just coming to borrow a pen so I can fill out this job application.
What? Oh, you're applying for work? Well, here, allow me. There we are.
Gosh, we'll miss you around here, but onward and upward.
So, what's the job?
Doorman.
Dear God.
Well, it's ideal for me, really. Nice cosy chair.
Plenty of time to think the long, long thoughts of youth.
Not to mention what the uniforms do for the ladies, eh? Ha-ha.
Memory serves, a certain bellhop back in Manchester
found that out with a young lady who will remain nameless.
Simon.
- I'm this close to just popping him one. - Daphne, you just have to calm down.
Here, have a cookie.
What is up with your appetite lately? You knocked up or something?
Of course not.
You wouldn't be the first person in our family
to be walking down the aisle carrying more than just a bouquet.
Oh, Simon, why don't you finish filling that out in the kitchen
- and help yourself to a beer? - Oh, great.
- Roz. - Hi, guys.
I felt kind of bad about the other day, dumping you as my wedding date.
- You want me back, don't you? - I'm sick about it
but I can't find anybody else.
Sorry, I already invited somebody else. She's driving on Saturday to join me.
Get rid of her. I need a date. I'm desperate.
Well, well, somebody here is singing my favourite song.
Simon, there's a guy who lives in the park across the street from me,
and he wears a cat suit and meows at people. If he's busy, maybe I'll call you.
I'll pretty myself up just in case.
Speaking of which, Daphne, I borrowed your blow-dryer
for my job interview.
I spent an hour looking for that. I thought I was losing my mind.
That does happen to women in your condition. You know, in a family way.
- You're pregnant? - I am not pregnant.
What, another scare then?
Like that time back in school with that Pakistani chap?
Right. Oh, that's it, you pig! Put me down.
FRASIER: Daphne and I are going out for a breath of fresh air,
perhaps retrieve her blow-dryer.
Oh, if Niles should happen to stop by, keep him here.
There's something I need to discuss.
Oh, for God's sakes, put me down.
Not until you promise not to kill your brother.
Oh, all right. It's not as if he doesn't deserve it.
Telling everyone I'm carrying Donny's baby.
Like I don't have enough to worry about today, waiting for Dr. Crane.
- Daphne, you have to calm down. - It's not easy.
I don't even know how to begin with him.
"Would you like steak or salmon at my wedding?
And by the way, I think I might be in love with you."
You'll find the words when the time comes, all right?
Don't pretend you're not listening. Your laundry is not that interesting.
Oh, come on, George, I'm desperate here.
I promise you a good time.
I mean a really good time, if you get my drift.
You might have mentioned I was on speakerphone.
Listen to what you're doing, Roz. It's not very dignified, is it?
- Come on, Roz, give Simon a chance. - What, so he can stand me up again?
And miss my sister's wedding? Never.
Look, if you're worried about my appearance,
I know where I can get my hands on some very nice Armani suits.
You can just grab one out of Frasier's closet.
What do you think he was talking about?
All right. Simon, just remember, my ex-boyfriend will be there.
If anybody asks, you're an Internet millionaire.
Right. I'll be the perfect well-bred, upmarket gentleman.
- Now, I'll walk you to the garage. - You don't have to.
Oh, it's no bother. I live there.
- Roz. Simon. - Niles.
By the look of that smile, I'd say somebody got himself a bit last night.
I find that remark rude, boorish and impossible to deny.
Brilliant.
- Niles, how was your trip? - Oh, fantastic, Dad.
- Where's Frasier? I have news. - He'll be back. What's up?
Oh, well, I should wait for Frasier. It was really is idea. Do you mind?
- I can wait. - Okay. I can't.
What is it?
I'm married.
- Married? - Yes, Mel and I eloped yesterday.
- Well? - Well...
- Congratulations, son. That's great. - Thanks, Dad.
- So you're happy, right? - Oh, happy? I'm delirious.
Yeah, you'd have to be, wouldn't you?
- So you say this was Frasier's idea? - Well, indirectly, yeah.
Before I forget, I think we should keep this from Daphne and Donny.
I would hate for them to think we're stealing their thunder.
- Oh, Niles. - Frasier.
- Three guesses what I did. FRASIER: What?
- Daphne. - Dr. Crane.
- Oh, send Daphne away. - Get rid of your father.
Could you go to the drugstore?
I'm all out of liniment, and my back's getting kind of achy.
Because you've been sitting all day. I'll tell you, you could use a good walk
to the drugstore, would do you a world of good.
- I'll go with you. MARTIN: Oh, all right.
- Niles, why don't you come too? - Yeah, we'll all go.
No, there's something very important I need to discuss with Dad, Niles.
- I'm sure you understand. MARTIN: Well, Fras...
Oh, excuse me.
Hello? No, darling, just hanging out with Daphne.
Honestly, Dad, when will you learn to take a hint?
I can't take a hint? Couldn't you see that Niles wanted to talk to you?
- Whatever it is, it can wait. - No big deal. He got married, that's all.
- What? - He eloped with Mel yesterday.
- Poor Daphne. - Would you please keep out of this?
- We've got to get back. - We're going to the basement.
I can't wait that long.
I'll see you later, darling.
- Sorry about that. - Oh, it's all right.
So, 48 hours till the big day. You must be pretty excited.
It's funny you should mention that.
You see, Dr. Crane...
Yes, Daphne.
Niles!
Dr. Crane, you're back awfully soon.
You're all out of breath. Is something wrong?
No, no, it's just there's something I need to discuss with Niles.
- What, now? We're having a chat. - Well, I'm sure it can wait.
Daphne, Daphne, I need to talk to Frasier too, if you don't mind.
Oh, of course not.
It's not like I had anything important to talk about.
- Is Daphne all right? - Well, it's just wedding stuff, I guess.
Speaking of which, I understand you have some news?
- You're married? NILES: Yes.
Guess Dad couldn't contain himself anymore than I could.
I thought you were just gonna move in together.
So did I, then the strangest thing happened.
As we talked, we got more excited about the idea of being together
and then I remembered your advice.
To stop taking baby steps through life.
Before we knew it, we're asking the waitress for a phone book
so we could find a justice of the peace.
What can I say but...
congratulations. NILES: Thank you.
Martin. Or should I say Dad?
Yeah, I heard.
- Hi, Mel. NILES: Oh, darling.
It occurred to me I think we should try to keep this quiet from Daphne.
Keep what quiet?
Oh, we can't keep something like this a secret. We got married.
Did you?
Yes, while we were out of town.
The last thing we want is to upstage you and Donny,
so we are not mentioning this outside this room.
Well, I am just so happy for you both.
We're having champagne. Would you like to join us?
I'd love to, but I have to get a cheque down.
- They're closing early today. FRASIER: Let me drive you over.
DAPHNE: Oh, no, I'm fine.
Congratulations again. Oh, save a glass for me.
This is the lounge,
and through there is the dining area where the rehearsal dinner will be.
Lovely. Have you seen the bride-to-be yet? I'd like to have a word with her.
No, I haven't.
So I thought we'd have the toasts right before dessert.
Dr. Crane.
I was wondering where you had gotten to yesterday.
After the caterer's, I went to Donny's so we could leave bright and early.
- It's lovely, isn't it? - Oh, yes.
Anybody else want something from the bar? Scotch rocks.
DAPHNE: Donny, it's barely noon.
- Your mom said she'd be here. - Give him a double.
Daphne, I was actually hoping that I could...
- I'll have whatever he's having. DAPHNE: Roz.
I don't even know why I came to this wedding. Hi, Daphne.
I was all set to drive up here myself
when I think, "Wait. I can't walk into that lobby alone."
What if my ex-boyfriend is here?"
So I agree to drive up with Simon.
There I am standing on the kerb with my garment bag,
and what does he pull up in? Your father's Winnebago.
Thank you. Don't go anywhere.
Next thing I know, we're heading down the highway
in the wrong direction, towards the airport.
Hey, I wasn't kidding.
Turns out, he's promised to ferry your entire family up here.
- All 14 of them? - Fifteen.
Your Aunt Ida got the weekend off from the bakery.
Judging by the size of her, it'll be the first Saturday they turn a profit.
Donny, maybe you could take Roz out for a walk in that
rejuvenating country air while I have a word with your fiancée?
DONNY: Come on, let's go. - You don't mind if I take this with me.
BARTENDER: Well... - I didn't think so.
Oh, Daphne.
I wanted you to know that I'm devastated by what happened.
It's all right, Dr. Crane.
When I advised you to have a chat with Niles,
I had no idea he'd run off and get married.
I know you're concerned for me, but I'm fine.
I thought about it all last night
and I realized what I was feeling was just wedding jitters.
I do love your brother, but I'm in love with Donny.
You're not just putting on a brave face?
No.
I'm a bit embarrassed now, making you worry for no reason.
Oh, it's all right, Daphne. It's what I do.
You've always been such a wonderful friend.
In fact, I brought this for the honeymoon, but I'd like you to have it.
Oh, Daphne, I couldn't.
- Donny and I aren't wine drinkers. - I wouldn't dream of it.
- All right, I'll keep it. - No, I've hurt your feelings. Here.
Oh, gosh, Daphne.
Tell you what, I promise that when I do drink this, I'll be thinking of you.
- Oh, come here. - Oh, Daph.
- There's my baby. DAPHNE: Oh, Mommy.
- Mom, this is... - Oh, I know who he is, love.
I want to thank you, Donny,
for rescuing my daughter from that horrible Dr. Crane.
- Well, actually... - Every time I call her,
I'm not on the phone five minutes
before that tyrant is ordering her to hang up.
Cup of tea, please.
Thought my daughter might get me one, but she didn't.
Oh, God, this seat's worse than the Winnebago.
Though not half as uncomfortable
as that sardine tin of a room you arranged for me.
Oh, God, I can't bear the smell of that. Take it away.
It reminds me of the salmon they served on the aeroplane.
If it doesn't have me hurling me guts out, it'll be by God's own intervention.
- Give your new mom a kiss, Donny. - Oh, actually, Mom, this isn't Donny.
- Oh, well, is, is this Mom? Hi. - Yes, this is Donny.
Well, come here, let's have a look at you.
We were starting to think our Daphne would never find herself a young man.
And I see she hasn't.
But beggars can't be choosers.
Well, I'm gonna go and see if your father's stomach is feeling any better.
He keeps saying it's tension.
What he's got to be tense about, I'll never know.
I was worried she'd be in one of her dark moods.
Boy, Daphne's brothers know how to let loose, don't they?
I'll say. Now listen, about their names.
The one who'll eat anything on a bet is Nigel.
No, that's Peter. Nigel's the one whose Band-Aid he ate.
See you later.
Hey, Fras, had enough, huh?
Oh, yeah.
I think I hit my limit when, in the middle of my toast, I looked down
and there was a man chewing on my boutonniere.
Oh, God, it's been a hell of a week.
I still can't get over Niles and Mel.
Didn't see that coming.
At least he says she makes him happy. There's nothing you can do about it.
- Actually... - Fras, don't even think
about trying to talk him out of it. He's married. End of story.
It's really not that simple, Dad. You see...
I shouldn't be talking to you about this.
Is this about Daphne?
- Why do you say that? - Oh, come on, I've got eyes.
I know something's going on. I've seen the way she's been looking at him.
She found out how Niles has felt about her all these years.
You're kidding. How'd she find out?
That's not important right now, Dad.
The problem is that she told me that she thinks
she might have the same feelings.
Oh, jeez.
Of course, then Niles shows up married.
Now she says it's just jitters.
Well, you can't tell Niles all this. He says he's happy with Mel.
She says she's happy with Donny.
I'm not sure I believe either one of them.
Just remember, Fras, there are two marriages on the line here.
So before you get involved,
you better make damn sure you know what you're doing.
Who blabbed? Roz?
Yeah, but she feels terrible.
- Hello, boys. - Hey.
Pack of smokes, please, barkeep?
- Oh, lovely spot, isn't it? FRASIER: Oh, yes.
I just took a nice little stroll outside around the wishing well.
- That'll be $4, please. SIMON: Oh, yeah, right.
There. This ought to cover it.
Tim, what a surprise. I had no idea you'd be here.
Simon, come here.
Oh, showtime.
Simon, this is my old friend, Tim. He's a computer programmer.
Oh, what a coincidence, with me owning my own software company.
Really? What sort of applications are you focused on?
Voice recognition, data encryption, something I'm working on for NASA.
I can't discuss that one.
Oh, very impressive.
- And Roz, are you still producing? - Oh, I'll say she is.
Oh, excuse me.
- Mind if we join you guys? - Sure.
Please. Yeah, there's plenty of room.
Give me a beer, please.
Sorry we didn't get a toast out of you, Mr. Crane.
I'm sorry. I really wanted to, Daphne, but I just felt kind of awkward.
Oh, it's all right.
Anyway, I should be toasting you.
I'm gonna miss you, you rotten old sod.
- Ballantine okay? - Oh, yeah, that's my beer. Yes.
I just found out they're gonna quit making this stuff.
- Really? - Yeah.
- Well, there's an end of an era. - That's right.
It's gonna be one sad day when I get down to my last one.
You know, it's funny, you get used to having something in your life,
it's part of your day, you just take it for granted.
And then suddenly it's gone and you realise how much it meant to you.
Hey, guys, great party.
Oh, Mel, why don't you take my seat?
- I'm gonna sit and enjoy the music. MARTIN: I'll join you, Fras.
- Take my beer. FRASIER: Sure.
- I'm just going to go to the restroom. - Seeing as this is my last night
as a carefree bachelor,
- would you care to dance, Miss? - I'd love to.
NILES: Uh-oh.
Well, certainly picked the perfect spot for your wedding.
It is, isn't it?
We're doing the ceremony in the garden.
Oh, it'll be beautiful.
I love this song.
Well, where are my manners? Would you like to dance?
All right.
It'll give us a chance to keep an eye on those two.
Oh, it's been a while since we've danced together.
Yes, it has.
Thanks for dinner.
This has been a wonderful evening.
It's one of those times you just don't want to end.
Excuse me, sir, do you mind if I cut in?
- Not at all. DONNY: Thank you.
Darling.
What in the world was so urgent
that you brought me all the way up here?
Niles, just sit down.
There's something I need to discuss with you.
I was watching you on the dance floor just now,
and the look in your eyes was unmistakable.
Well, can you blame me? Mel's quite the little dancer.
Of course, her vertigo does rule out any serious twirling, but...
Niles, I'm talking about Daphne.
The way you were looking at her.
Well, it just breaks my heart.
Frasier, it was one thing when you were beating this drum the other day,
but I'm married now.
What's it going to take to convince you that I am over her?
She knows.
What?
Daphne knows that you have feelings for her. She's known for some time.
How?
Well, it's a long story.
I think Roz said something. Anyway, she knows.
I knew you thought my marriage to Mel was hasty, but to poison it like this...
- I'm not going to listen to this. - She feels the same way about you.
At least I think she does.
She told me the other day, then she denied it once you got married.
But I saw the way she was looking at you downstairs just now.
Oh, my God.
Niles, I'm not in the habit of breaking up people's marriages.
But how could I not tell you?
You're my brother. I love you.
MEL: Niles, darling?
- Yes, honey? - You left with our only room key.
Oh, here, I'll let you through this way.
- I am so sorry. - Oh, it's all right.
You have a whole lifetime to make it up to me.
This is awful.
- I love Mel. It's just... - I know, I know.
I have to talk to Daphne.
- Yes. All right. - Come with me.
Maybe while I'm speaking to her, you can find some way to occupy...
- Oh, Donny. Oh, Daphne. DAPHNE: Hi.
Hi, doc. Things are getting too wild for us down there.
Well, it's just as well. We all have a very big day tomorrow.
About that, Daphne, can I have a word with you?
- All right. - You go ahead.
I'm gonna get out of these shoes, I'll see you. Good night.
You know, I'll just brave the hordes and see if I can get myself a nightcap.
Good night.
- So, Daphne. - Yes?
- May I offer you something to drink? - No, thank you.
All right.
- Anyway, Daphne. - Perhaps an Orangina.
Oh, all right, maybe I'll join you.
Funny thing about Orangina.
I never buy Orangina at home,
but whenever I'm in a hotel and there's a minibar, it's the first thing I go for.
Orangina.
Anyway-
I was just talking to Frasier about a conversation you two had.
- Oh, dear. - Oh, no, don't get upset.
I specifically asked him not to say anything. What was he thinking?
No, I'm glad he told me.
Oh, yes, so we can have a big talk about it.
That's what you psychiatrists always do,
drag everything out in the open so we can work through it
no matter how awkward it might be.
- Well, I just don't see the point... - No, Daphne, I'm glad he told me.
Because I love you.
MARTIN: Oh, excuse me. - Oh, Dad.
I'm sorry. I thought you're in here with Frasier.
The boys are playing a game called William Tell with the seltzer hose.
Uh, oh, well...
Anyway, you two go on doing whatever you were doing and I'll just...
I'll be down in the lobby by the fireplace.
Dr. Crane, you shouldn't say such things.
It's the truth.
Lord knows I have tried to deny it, tried to pretend that I'm over you.
But not a day has gone by when I haven't thought of you.
Your smile, your beautiful eyes.
What it would be like to hold your hands
and ask you the question I never dared ask?
What's the difference between a blister and a boil?
DAPHNE: Donny. - Oh, God, I took my shoe off,
it was like I was growing another ankle bone down here.
Doc, you went to med school.
What am I supposed to do with this, lance it or something?
You know, as I recall,
best thing for that would be to soak it in tepid water for at least half an hour.
All right. What luck, huh?
Can you imagine a worse thing to happen to me
the night before my wedding?
I don't understand. How come you never said anything before?
I wanted to. I just... The timing never seemed right.
Oh, and the timing's right now?
I'm 12 hours from the altar and you're on your honeymoon.
I would never have gotten married
if I thought there was the chance that you shared my feelings.
Trust me, Daphne, say the word and I will leave Mel in a heartbeat.
MEL: Niles? - Darling.
I was just looking over these brochures for our honeymoon.
- Hi, Daphne. - Hi.
The Danieli has a step-down tub,
the Gritti has a romantic view of the Grand Canal. What do you think?
I think a woman with your exquisite taste can handle this decision.
Oh, he says that now. Wait till the honeymoon's over.
Don't the doors in this bloody place lock?
I'll get this one, you get that one.
Daphne, it is not too late for us.
I meant what I said when I said I would leave her.
- That's crazy. - No, no, it's not crazy
if you feel the same way I do.
But I need you to tell me.
And I can accept it if the answer is no.
How do you feel about me?
- Oh, pardon. - Simon, how did you get in here?
Oh, Frasier loaned me his key, in a manner of speaking.
I have to get some things out of the minibar.
Don't want to get caught empty-handed when last call comes.
You're not having a last call of your own in here, are you, Stilts?
- Of course not. - Right.
This isn't the chap whose baby you're having, is it?
- Excuse me? - I'm not pregnant.
- Oi, Simon, bit of bad news. - Nigel?
Peter's gotten sick into the piano, so we've been asked to vacate the bar.
Bloody hell, Daphne. Nice hotel you picked.
Nigel, I'm sure Daphne won't mind
if we help ourselves to the contents of her minibar.
- Way you go. - Right. Give us a hand, lads.
Nigel, Stephen, Peter, David, Michael, Billy,
- what are you all doing in here? - So here you all are.
What is the point of bringing the party down to the Winnebago
when there's a perfectly nice room right here?
You're not moving the party in here.
Oh, Daphne, don't get your blood pressure up.
You've got your baby to think of. Here, have a drink and relax. Oh, God.
I'm sorry about all that.
I must be in love. It doesn't even bother me that you come with them.
- Lovely night, isn't it? - Mm.
The stars are out. There's a nice breeze.
Mm. Night-blooming jasmine.
Of course, there's the beautiful girl.
Dr. Crane, I still haven't answered your question.
Yes, I know. That's why I keep talking.
In case I don't get the answer I want,
I can at least make this moment last a little longer.
I'm not sure if it's jasmine or orange blossoms.
- You know, a lot of times... - Oh, for God's sake, Dr. Crane.
I think you can call me Niles now.
No, I don't think I can.
I do love you, but I can't do this.
I know it'll be difficult, but I will get a divorce.
- And you can call off the wedding. - I can't.
Donny is a dear and wonderful man, and I made a promise to him.
And Mel, you made more than a promise to her.
Are we supposed to forget that? And for what?
We have no idea how we'd be together.
For heaven's sakes, we've never even been on a date.
Daphne, take it from someone who knows,
you don't wanna spend half your life thinking of a chance you didn't take.
I'm sorry.
My mind's made up.
I think we should say good night now.
Good night, Daphne.
Good night, Dr. Crane.
Hey, Niles.
Don't tell me the ceremony's over already.
- Oh, no, it hasn't even started yet. - We saw you heading over this way.
We thought maybe you could use some company.
I just felt like some privacy.
This is one wedding I couldn't see myself handling well.
Lots of people cry at weddings.
Yeah, but not so many end up wailing and rending their garments.
No, I appreciate your coming, but I'd hate for you to miss it on my account.
It's been delayed a bit.
The justice of the peace started out asking the witnesses to step forward.
And three of Daphne's brothers just ran off into the woods.
Ah.
- Hello. - Here's your wine, sir.
Yes, thank you very much, young man. And this is for you.
What is this?
Well, Niles, I got to thinking about our old friend Morrie
and how he kept this bottle of wine his entire life
waiting for a special occasion.
And then I thought, what occasion am I saving it for?
And then I thought about what a courageous thing you did last night,
taking that chance.
And that's worth a toast.
- No, no, Frasier... FRASIER: No, Niles, it's too late.
The foil is pierced.
I know this thing between you and Mel seems kind of bad right now.
Oh, now, Dad, why do you say that?
Because I spent the third night of my marriage proposing to another woman?
Well, I'm just saying that marriages survive all kinds of stuff.
You know, you might still be happy.
Ten years from now, this could all be ancient history.
I hope you're right.
FRASIER: All right, gentlemen.
Here we are now.
- Dad, Niles. NILES: Thank you.
Allow me.
To better days.
Dad, where did Morrie keep this?
- In his wine rack. - Which is?
- In the boiler room. - Oh, Lord.
I'll just save this little treat for later.
Yes, well, thanks for the thought.
You two should be running. I'll be fine.
- All right, well, take care, Niles. - Thanks, Dad.
You know, I saw a waiter passing champagne just outside.
I'll have him bring you a glass so can...
Get the taste out. Yes, thank you, Frasier.
Come in.
Hello.
Daphne.
I was wondering if you might be free for a date.
Oh, my God, yes.
There's plenty of time for that later. Let's get this bloody boat moving.
What, you mean now?
There's about a hundred people back there I'm not so keen on seeing.
Well, all right. Let's go, then.
Fasten your seat belt, Daphne.
Fasten yours, Niles.